Is Your Life Out of Control?

Perhaps it’s because I have recently had a holiday, but I have found that many conversations with people are based around how busy they are that they never get time for themselves. The conversation usually ends with, “but what can I do?”

This is said as a statement not a question. I then find that I am in a dilemma as I know they are not really seeking a solution or advice from me. What is it they are looking for when they say something like that? Is it confirmation that they are right; life is too busy, none of us have control? Is it agreement? Do they want to hear how busy I am too which confirms their beliefs? What is the outcome they are looking for? I could challenge them on their statement, but I know that is not what they are seeking at all.

So what do I mean by challenge them? I could ask them if they have thought of any activities that they could eliminate? That could be from reducing work hours, to resigning from a committee, it may be the kids, reduce the number of activities they are involved with, perhaps they get a house cleaner, a gardener, or even ask the family members to step up and help out a little bit more.

Realistically, we have choices in life. At times, I am not sure we realise that. We are the one who need to take control of our life. If we do look at all the activities we are doing and we don’t want to drop out, reduce, eliminate or change any of them then we have chosen that option. When you think of it this way that usually means you are doing all these things because you want to. That means you have chosen this and you are comfortable with your choices. Perhaps just looking at it in this way can mean that you no longer feel overwhelmed or pushed as you have decided to live this way. It is your choice and you are happy with that.

Did they end up with too many commitments because they can’t say no when others ask for help and support? If that is you then you need to take some time to think about who is benefiting from you helping out and who is not benefitting. The committee you are on may benefit greatly from your support but maybe it is you who is pushed just that little bit too far. It could be your partner or other family members that are missing you. If this is the case then it is time to take stock, and more importantly take responsibility and do the right thing by you.

I know it is a bit of a rant this time but I do feel strongly about this. Life is all about choices and we are the drivers. If we want to exercise but can’t find the time, that means we have made a choice that exercise isn’t a priority. If we want to catch up with friends but don’t make the call, then we are making a choice and that isn’t a priority. They actually say if you want to do something enough, you will make that a priority. Deep down that really means we are the drivers and if we feel out of control so much that we find we aren’t enjoying our life then we need to do something different.

If you are feeling trapped then reflect on the words by Audrey Hepburn “Nothing is impossible.The word itself says “I’m possible.” We just have to work out how to make it happen. What do you need to do differently to take back control?

Make Life Easier – Be Clear on Your Values

The last few weeks we have focused on strategies to function at your best. They covered physical, emotional, mental and spiritual. This week, we are going to look at values. The reason is when we live a life that is aligned with our values, we are living a fulfilled life.

Values aren’t morals or principles. They are the essence of who you are—not who you think you should be. For example, some people feel having money is a value. Please be aware that money is not a value. The things that money may provide you such as free time, risk-taking, and being of service are values.

It is when we are aligned with our values, that we feel inner harmony, our choices are more easily made, and our actions are in agreement with our true self.

This is a quiz I found which allows you to see how well you are living in accord with your values.

1. I have spent time clarifying my values and can articulate them easily.
2. My values are my own. I have not simply adopted them from parents, teachers, friends or other outside influences.
3. I base my choice of occupation on my deepest values.
4. My values are in alignment with the company I work for (or own).
5. My associates and I regularly examine how we are living up to our values and mission.
6. I turn down money-making or status-building opportunities when they conflict with my values.
7. In resolving disputes at work, I look beneath the apparent problem to see if values are being dishonored, and then I seek ways to honor them.
8. Anyone looking at my life from the outside would see what I value.
9. I use my values as a guidepost for making decisions. I ask if a particular choice would bring me closer to—or further from—a core value.
10. When I feel upset, it’s almost always because my values are being trampled—either by me, someone else, or the situation.
11. I am not easily swayed by others’ opinions when they conflict with my values.
12.  To remain open and flexible, I am willing to re-examine my values to determine whether something is still true for me.
13. I find creative ways to honor all of my values—even when they conflict with one another.
14. My work values are in harmony with my personal and relationship values.
15. If I live according to my values, I will feel satisfied and successful throughout my life.

If you answered false more often than true, you may wish to clarify your deepest values and bring your life into greater alignment with them. Even if you answered true more than false, these questions provide a base by which you can ponder how you can improve living a value based life.

Take some time to think through these questions and don’t rush through them. Ponder and dig deep always looking for a better answer, a more considered answer, a truthful answer. Not the one you want to answer, but the answer you know is true and correct. If these questions were uncomfortable then don’t worry. Each week take one question, think of what you would love your answer to be and then start living that way. 

How to Increase Your Energy Levels – Spiritually

We have been focusing on energy levels the last few articles. Specifically, the four levels of energy which are:

• Physical
• Emotional
• Mental
• Spiritual

Last week, we looked at the Mental Energy Levels. In numerous workplaces, the message is that we need to work longer to increase our productivity. Many workplaces no longer have formal morning and afternoon tea breaks. We think we’re getting more done when we continue to work through lunch. A workout during the middle of the day is frowned upon. We’re encouraged to keep our heads down and grind away for as long as we can. However, when we are mentally rested it makes a massive difference to our ability to focus.

This week, I am wishing to talk about how to Increase Your Energy levels – spiritually. Spiritual is not in the religious sense but is the connection to a deeply held set of values and the connection to your inner self, to having a greater purpose than your own good. It’s about contributing to society, which can drive us; it’s a purpose beyond our own self. This means our passion, commitment, integrity, and honesty.

It’s about being in tune with yourself. Think of a radio station; you tune your inner self to the right frequency and you will move around like a favorite song.

We need to balance our spiritual energy between our commitment to others and our own personal self-care. Commitment to ourselves first, commitment to what we dream, desire, and believe in ourselves, and then the commitment to others will come with believing in ourselves and our own abilities.

When we’re connected and giving, it can drive us on in the tough times. It gives us the skills to breathe through the bumps and issues and cruise through the straight roads as we face each and every challenge. We can often motivate ourselves to do it for ‘others’ when we feel we have given our all. ‘Others’ is your own personal connection, whether that’s the poor in Africa, the bears in Asia, the bush fire victims in your own state or your local charity group.

These groups are beyond our own ‘self-interest.’ By giving to others, whether time, money, support, or encouragement, we stay committed to our values, dreams, desires and beliefs. This creates stability for our own lives. It gives us perspective about our own life. It can make us feel good, which helps us emotionally. We can develop strong relationships and generally better face our own personal challenges with a more positive frame of mind.

In the book “The Power of Full Engagement” the authors Jim Loehr & Tony Schwartz wrote, “Spiritual strength is reflected in the commitment to one’s deepest values, regardless of circumstances and even when adhering to them involves personal sacrifice. Spiritual flexibility, by contrast, reflects the tolerance for values and beliefs that are different than one’s own, so long as those values and beliefs don’t bring harm to others.”

It is important to think about our deepest values and ensure that we are behaving according to our values. That we are aligned, it is when we are misaligned that we struggle and battle with ourselves.

Being true to what you hold as your deepest values means you are aligned. It is worth taking the time to think this through as it makes a big difference to your overall energy levels.

How to Increase Your Energy Levels - Emotionally

We have been focusing on energy levels the last few articles. Specifically the four levels of energy which are:

• Physical
• Emotional
• Mental
• Spiritual

Last week, we looked at the physical elements which include:

• Sleep – enough rest and relaxation for your body
• Nutrition – eating good healthy food regularly especially breakfast in the morning
• Water – ensuring your body stays hydrated
• Exercise – daily activity assists your body to perform at its best
• Breathing – take the time to breathe deeply

This week, we will focus on our emotions. Emotions strongly impact our productivity. Positive emotions include enjoyment, love, gratitude, hope, challenge, adventure and opportunity. Negative emotions are costly in that they take away our focus and ability to concentrate. When we’re filled with negative emotions we can be like a time bomb ready to ‘go off’ at any moment.

When we’re emotionally balanced, we can deal with mishaps, changes, challenges and difficult circumstances with a clear head, and we become less stressed. Take a moment every day to think of what you’re grateful for. It’s easy to find things that you’re grateful for - from having a house to live in, clothes to wear, food to eat, and clean water to drink. It’s often the most basic of items that we do take for granted, but if we didn’t have these; our lives would be incredibly different.

A study by the Gallup Organisation found that the productivity of an employee is greatly influenced based on his relationship with his direct superior. Gallup found that the key factors of productivity for employees include:

• Feeling cared for by a supervisor or someone at work
• Receiving recognition or praise
• Having someone at work encouraging their development.

Shawn Achor presents on the Happiness Advantage and comments that you could improve your productivity by 30% just by being happy. Wow – that’s a huge increase in productivity just through happiness. Shawn has discovered that happiness actually fuels success. If you can find a way for your brain to become positive our success rates will increase. As a result, work will become more productive, enjoyable and rewarding. By doing this we will be able to maximize our brains potential. This means that we aren’t waiting to be successful to be happy, we are happy we will be successful and we are happy in the present, this moment, not waiting for some unknown to make us happy.

I know this sounds bizarre because we have thought for so long that it is the other way around. However, there is research to back it up. Think of organizations like Google, Apple and Zippos’ that are massive internationally successful companies. They have a strong focus on their staff and allowing their staff to be comfortable, relaxed and happy at work. This focus then means the staff are engaged, their values are aligned with the company. It is a massive shift from so many of the serious companies that are so flat out that staff don’t even have time to chat and have a basic conversation. Let alone a laugh at work.

A study in 2006 by the Gallop poll organisation revealed that disengaged employees that are 21% of the workforce cost at that time the Australian economy over $32 billion dollars.

In the book “Delivering Happiness” by Tony Hsieh, he commented that “Studies have shown that engaged employees are more productive, and that the number of good friends and employee has at work is correlated with how engaged that employee is. In The Happiness Hypothesis, author Jonathan Haidt concludes that happiness doesn’t come primarily from within but rather from between. This is one of the reasons why we place so much emphasis on company culture at Zippos.”

We need to schedule time for activities that give us enjoyment and fulfillment as this delivers positive emotions both at work and external from work. What activities do you enjoy? I find that when I spend time gardening, I relax. It’s quiet time and I’ll find myself smiling for no reason in particular. It’s an activity that gives me time to recharge my batteries. Then when it is time to work I am ready to go. My body and mind have disengaged, relaxed, I am happy. What is it you need to do to bring positive emotions into the workplace? 

How to Increase Your Energy Levels - Physical

Last week’s article talked about functioning at your best and we identified the four categories that we need to spend some time on to be overall well balanced and support our energy levels. Our aim is to manage our energy so that we can manage our time better, be more productive, focused and reduce our stress. The quality of our energy is a reflection of our physical capacity.

The four levels of energy are:

• Physical
• Emotional
• Mental
• Spiritual

This week, we will focus on Physical Energy levels and what we can do to look after ourselves physically so we can be the best possible in all aeas of our life.

Physical

It’s important to look after ourselves to be at our most efficient and productive. Ways to do this for our physical body include:

• Sleep – enough rest and relaxation for your body
• Nutrition – eating good healthy food regularly especially breakfast in the morning
• Water – ensuring your body stays hydrated
• Exercise – daily activity assists your body to perform at its best
• Breathing – take the time to breathe deeply

Sleep

As individuals, we don’t give sleep the priority we should. Sleeping is one of the major ways for our minds and body to recover. Consider how you feel and function after a night when you didn’t get a ‘proper’ night’s sleep. It can affect your focus, concentration, energy, mood, memory, logic and even your reaction time.

We should go to bed at the same time each night and wake up at the same time each day for our body rhythms to be consistent. Know how much sleep you need to function at your best and ensure that becomes a priority.

The National Sleep Foundation reported that drowsy workers cost U.S. employers an estimated $18 billion annually in lost productivity. Research showed that too little sleep suppresses your immune function, which leads to increased infection and illnesses, creating more absenteeism. The quality of work, amount of work, and your concentration decline by 30% EACH when you’re sleepy.

Nutrition

We all know that the food we consume makes an incredible difference to our energy levels; a few tips include:

• Eat more fruit and vegetables [at least two servings of fruit and five of vegetables]
• Manage your portion size
• Eat less processed food
• Eat regular meals
• Eat a healthy breakfast
• Limit the amount of snack food such as chips, lollies, chocolate, biscuits, cakes, pastries, pies, and sausage rolls as they often contain excess salt, fat and sugar.

Include healthy snacks on your shopping list as this is where many of us get caught out. Perhaps keep dried fruit and nuts in your desk draw and store low-fat yoghurt in the fridge at work.

Water

We should be drinking at least eight glasses of water a day or eating food that’s high in water content. This will maintain hydration in our body.

The trick is to tie drinking water to a routine activity. For example, if you go on a morning walk take a water bottle. Before your morning cup of tea, drink a glass of water. Have another glass of water at lunch and another glass of water at afternoon teatime. Carry a water bottle in the car and every time you stop at traffic lights, have a drink. You can pick any activity as long as it’s something you do at least five days a week.

Exercise

Many of us want to spend more time exercising, but we can’t find the time. The key here is to change our thinking. Rather than trying to find time to exercise, what we need to do is invest time in exercise that will give us more energy.

The following statistics are from ‘The Power of Full Engagement’ by Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz. They reported the link between exercise exposure and performance.

• DuPont reported a 47.5% reduction in absenteeism over a six-year period for participants in a corporate fitness program.
• A study in the journal ergonomics concluded that fit workers committed 27% fewer errors on tasks involving concentration and short-term memory as compared to un-fit workers.
• In a study of eighty executives over a nine-month period, those who worked out regularly improved their fitness by 22% and demonstrated a 70% improvement in their ability to make complex decisions as compared with non-exercisers.
• The Canadian Life Assurance Company found that 63% of participants in a fitness program reported being more physically relaxed, less tired and more patient during the workday. Some 47% reported being more alert, having better rapport with supervisors and co-workers, and experiencing a higher level of enjoyment at work.

Breathing

Breathing is a tool to deeply relax and increase energy. Try this breathing technique:

• Breath in – count to three,
• Breath out to a count of six,
• Do this three times.

It quiets the body, mind and emotions. Deep, smooth and rhythmic breathing is known to be a source of energy; it increases alertness, focus and relaxation. If you’re having a mid-project lull, perhaps a few deep breaths is all that you need to do to get your focus back on track.

If you start working on one of these areas each week in no time you will have developed some amazing new positive habits to boost your energy levels.

Functioning at Your Best

All of us have a “prime time” in the day; it’s that time when you feel good, focused, and productive. For some, it’s early morning, while for others, it’s later in the day or evening. The idea is to understand the time you function at your best and schedule your daily routine around  your energy cycles.

An energy cycle is how your body functions throughout the day. You need to take note of when you feel good, when you feel tired, or you are just chugging along going through the motions. Not really achieving anything but looking like you are working.

Tracking your energy cycle comes from asking questions such as, are you an early bird or a night owl? Early birds get up and are ready to go as soon as they wake. Night owl’s find they’re slower to get up of a morning and get going but busy themselves with work of an evening.  For others, it is in between these two scenarios. The time you feel you work better, is the time to schedule the work that requires the most concentration, focus and creativity. Leave the less demanding work such as reading mail, emails, and phone calls until your energy has dropped.

Energy Management not Time Management

Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz in their book ‘The Power of Full Engagement’ wrote, “The number of hours in a day is fixed, but the quantity and quality of energy available to us is not. It’s our most precious resource. The more we take responsibility for the energy we bring to the world, the more empowered and productive we become.”

“Energy, not time, is our most precious resource"

Loehr and Schwartz

What we need to do is manage our energy so that we can manage our time better, be more productive, focused, and reduce our stress. The quality of our energy is a reflection of our physical capacity.

The four levels of energy are:

• Physical
• Emotional
• Mental
• Spiritual

Physical energy – when your physical cycle is low, you may tire easily and be susceptible to illness. When your physical energy is high, you feel better and can accomplish more.

Emotional energy – this affects our mental stability, sensitivity, moods and emotions. When it’s low, we may be moody, bad tempered and irritable. When it’s good, we’re more likely to be cheerful, happy and sensuous.

Mental [Intellectual] energy – this is our ability to learn, memorise and analyse; our logic is sharp, our decision making and concentration is at its best. When it’s low, we may display poor judgement, find it hard to concentrate and have difficulty remembering things. When it’s high, we solve problems quickly, have a good memory and think effectively.

Spiritual energy – this doesn’t mean spiritual  in the ‘religious’ sense but in the connection to our values and to a purpose beyond our own self-interest. When it’s low, we can have a lack of drive. Spiritual energy is sustained by balancing a commitment to others with sufficient self-care.

If we’re balanced in all of these areas, we have the capacity to function at our best. That’s a fantastic way to be living life.

When we’re planning our week, we need to make sure we include “positive habits” to manage our energy in the four areas.

 “Enthusiasm finds the opportunities

and energy makes the most of them”

Henry S. Haskins

In future articles, we will provide more information on what you can do to look after your energy levels so that you can function at the best levels for you.

Developing a Clear Direction

In life and at work it is very easy to just take each day as it comes, to go with the flow, see what happens. However, if we are going to take ownership of our life, be the master of our destiny, then we have to start making plans. We need to think about what it is we want in life. Where we are going, what outcomes are we looking for. To develop a clear direction of our plans we actually need to set goals.

As individuals we actually set goals all the time such as:

• I have 1 hour to do the grocery shopping
• Today, I will get the washing done
• I will go for a 5 km walk
• I will eat 3 pieces of fruit

But we want to set goals that give us long-term direction, focus, and motivation to keep going, move forward, and persevere.

Once you have established your goals, the next action to successful goal setting is working out how to achieve your goal. A great place to start is to make notes on paper, drawing a road map to your success.

If you don't know where you are going,
you'll end up someplace else.
Yogi Berra

Goals provide us with a focus for our activities and give us direction, helping to keep our ‘eye on the prize.’

At any one time we have family members, work colleagues, and friends  all wanting us to spend time with them, there are tasks that needs to be done, things we would like to do if only we had the time; however, when we know our goals, we have focus and direction – it makes decision making easier. We understand where our priorities and focus need to be.

So if goal setting is so important and we know from history that the people who have been very successful often have a strong focus and direction, why is it that the majority of people do not set life goals?

It takes time, it takes thought, it means a commitment, it means we may feel disappointed if we don’t succeed. It can even be fear – fear of the unknown. Fear around what if I am that good, what if …

At the end of the day, they are all “what-if’s”. It is important to be the master of our own life, to take time to create the life we want. To step up and make some decisions. Some will be easy, some will be tough, but it is in this that we grow to be the person we want to be - that we grow to live the life we aspire to live.

It’s time, it's time to get excited about your own life. Do those things you have always dreamed of doing. Just imagine for a while your ideal life, then break it down in what are the steps you need to take to get there. What is the first thing you need to do?

Think about what it is you want to achieve and take that first step.